


I Refuse To Let You Make Me Feel Like I Can't Fly

by LahraTeigh



Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: Abuse, Angst, Arguing, Bullying, Child Abuse, Depressed Lee Felix (Stray Kids), Domestic Violence, Homelessness, Homophobic Language, Implied/Referenced Suicide attempt, M/M, Multi, Mute Lee Felix (Stray Kids), Orphan - Freeform, Panic Attacks, Runaway, Self-Harm, Shoplifting, Sick Yang Jeongin, Stealing, Suicidal Thoughts, Suicide Attempt(ish), Swearing
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-03-11
Updated: 2021-03-17
Packaged: 2021-03-18 05:40:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 3,083
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29978190
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LahraTeigh/pseuds/LahraTeigh
Summary: They came from different lives, but found each other on the streets.
Relationships: Bang Chan/Everyone, Bang Chan/Han Jisung/Hwang Hyunjin/Kim Seungmin/Lee Felix/Lee Minho/Seo Changbin/Yang Jeongin, Han Jisung | Han/Everyone, Hwang Hyunjin/Everyone, Kim Seungmin/Everyone, Lee Felix (Stray Kids)/Everyone, Lee Minho | Lee Know/Everyone, Seo Changbin/Everyone, Yang Jeongin | I.N/Everyone
Kudos: 47





	1. A Bunch Of Strays

**Author's Note:**

> I was inspired by the Hellevator music video.
> 
> And this doesn’t include Woojin because I actually found Stray kids after he already left, so I don’t know him or his personality, like I do the others 😅
> 
> Ahh well

They met on the streets. 

The runaways, and those who had been lonely and abandoned. 

“My Mother used to work here before she died, but it’s been abandoned for years now.” Seungmin sighed, looking around the high ceilings.

The other seven boys looked around too. 

“I saw a couch on the street a few moments ago. Someone help me bring it back here.” Changbin said enthusiastically. 

“We’ll help you, let’s go!” Bangchan smiled back, dragging both Hyunjin and Jisung by the shirts as he and Changbin ran out the doors. 

Minho rolled his eyes, looking to Felix who was standing around awkwardly.

He was the newest on the streets, the newest to their group.

“How are you doing? Do you like this place?” Minho asked the younger boy. 

Felix shrugged.

Felix has only ever spoken a few times since they all met. 

Minho sighed.  
“Come help me see if there’s any food lying around. Maybe some old tinned foods are still in date.” 

Felix nodded, following the older through another part of the building. 

Seungmin turned to where the youngest was, Jeongin was in one of the rooms close by, going through some the stuff, an old television and speaker sat in the corner. 

“Think these still work?” He asked when Seungmin walked up to him. 

The elder shrugged.  
“Maybe. But I doubt this place even has power.” 

Jeongin sighed.  
“I guess your right.” 

They both looked around the cluttered room, looking for anything interesting. 

Four shouts and cheers echoed in the large building.  
“We got a lounge! Come check it out!” Bangchan laughed.

Minho and Felix entered back into the area, holding four out of date cans of something unknown.

“Eww. That’s ugly.” Minho turned his face up in disgust. 

Changbin scoffed.  
“But at lease we have a lounge.” He said a-matter-of-factly.

“And it turns into a bed!” Jisung smiled excitedly. 

Minho raised an eyebrow.  
“Seven boys are going to fit on that bed, are they?” He asked sarcastically, earning a laugh from Felix, shocking everyone. 

Changbin smirked.  
“We could. We’ll have to squish close together tho.” He winked to Jeongin, who blushed in return. 

Everyone else laughed at the youngest’s shyness. Everyone except Minho.  
“Would you leave the poor kid alone. He still has innocents. Which is more than I can say about you lot.” 

“Lighten up, Min.” Bangchan said, setting the lounge’s bed up. 

He flopped onto the bed, starfish style. 

Jisung and Changbin both laughed, not giving the older a chance to defend himself as they both jumped on him.


	2. Minho

Minho knew better than to piss off his father, so why he thought that day was the day to do it, he doesn’t know. 

He sat by the train station licking his split lip, flinching as it stung. 

He spat blood on the ground, groaning in disgust.

A pair of feet stop in front of him. 

He scoffed.  
“Take a photo it’ll last longer.” 

The person didn’t answer.

Minho looked up, noticing a boy roughly around the same age, he thinks he might be younger.  
“What’s your fucking problem, huh?” He yelled. 

The boy in front of him handed over a tube of cream. 

Minho scrunched up his face.  
“What the fuck is this?” He asked rudely.

“It’ll help the cut on your lip.” The boy mumbled. 

Minho took notice of the boy’s own split lip and black eye. He jumped to his feet, suddenly feeling worried and protective for some odd reason.

The boy stepped back, startled.  
Minho winced at his own intensity. 

“Sorry. I didn’t mean to scare you. Your lip...your eye...did...you know. Did your Dad or...Someone give you that.” Minho stuttered.

The boy shook his head.  
“Kids at school.” 

Minho sighed with relief. 

“But it’s not like my parents helped at all. They said I need to stand up for myself.” The boy mumbled. 

Minho frowned.  
“I’m Minho, by the way.” He said, holding out his hand. 

“Jeongin.” The boy whispered, shaking Minho’s hand. 

Minho smiled, splitting his lip open once again.

“It’s getting late, you should get home before it gets dark, Jeongin.” The eldest said.

Jeongin bit his split lip, looking away.  
“I don’t have a home anymore.” He whispered. 

The sentence didn’t sit right with Minho, but he nodded anyway.  
“You want to join me? I have an extra granola bar.” He smiled.


	3. Jeongin

“Stay down, faggot.” One of the boys spat, knocking Jeongin to the ground, causing the group of girls close by to giggle.

The smaller boy sighed, holding in his tears as his ankle twisted the wrong way.

“Want me to give you a second black eye to match the other?” The bully asked sadistically. 

Jeongin shook his head.

“That’s what I fucking thought.”

The two boys and the group of girls walked away laughing. 

Jeongin was sick of this. The same shit every single day. 

His parents didn’t help either, they kept telling him he just needed to grow a backbone, and to stop acting like a bitch. 

The day Jeongin had enough and ran away from home, was the day he met Minho. 

Only to meet Bangchan a few weeks later. 

Minho laughed, arms wrapped around Jeongin as they walked. 

Jeongin bit into the ham sandwich Minho had swiped from a picnicking couple. 

Minho bit into an apple.

They heard some rustling, followed by a frustrated string of cursing. 

Jeongin gulped.  
“Do you think they’re going to...” he started to say.

Minho bit into his apple again before following the sound.   
“Stay here.” He warned the younger.

“Min, don’t leave me.” The younger panicked, whispering. 

Minho put a finger to his lips, walking in the direction of the noise.

“Fuck!” The voice cried out again. 

Minho rounded the corner, coming face to face with a boy.

“Shit!” Yelled the boy, startled.  
“You scared me.” He placed a hand over his heart. 

Minho smiled.  
“Sorry, I didn’t mean to startle you. I was just wondering if you were okay. Me and my friend could hear you swearing.” 

The boy nodded before shaking his head.  
“Ahh. Just hungry. I haven’t eaten in several days.” 

Minho made a small sound of realisation. He handed over his apple. 

“I took a few bites, but you can have this.” 

The hungry boy snatched the apple, shoveling it in his mouth. 

He moaned.   
“Thank you so much.” He said with a mouth full of apple. 

“My name’s Bangchan, by the way.” 

“I’m Minho. My friend over there.” He pointed.   
“His name is Jeongin.” 

Bangchan waved to the younger boy. Jeongin waved back.

“There is a shaded spot under the trees if you would like to join us for a stolen picnic.” Jeongin said, holding up the picnic basket. 

Bangchan laughed and nodded.  
“Hell yeah. I’d love to.”


	4. Bangchan

Bangchan had been at the orphanage since he was three, going through home after home after home, only to be sent back to the orphanage less than a week later due to ‘problems’. 

These ‘problems’, you ask? 

Because of his self harm. The depression. 

It was the loneliness he felt that caused the depression that made him self harm. 

If only people would talk to him, make him feel whole, like an ACUAL human being. 

Mother Hua sat by Bangchan on the step on the orphanage.   
She sighed. 

“I’m sorry.” He mumbled. 

“It’s not your fault, Kid. Some people just aren’t ready to take in a teenager with a lot of-“ 

“With a lot of baggage? Is that what you were going to say?” He interrupted. 

She shook her head softly.  
“Of course not, Christopher.” 

Bangchan scoffed.   
“Yeah. Right. Okay, well. I’m going for a walk. I’ll be back later.” He walked towards the front gates. 

“Don’t be too late, Christopher. Be back before dinner.” Mother Hua called out to him. 

He gave a thumbs up without turning her way.  
“You wish.” He mumbled as he took one last look at the building that he won’t miss.

“Good fucking riddance.”


	5. Changbin

Changbin had never felt as free as he did now. 

Living in two separate houses, where both parents blamed him for everything that went wrong in their lives. 

Changbin didn’t tell his dad to fuck is mum’s sister.

And he didn’t tell his mother to blow all their life savings due to a gambling addiction. 

But hey, life was much easier for Changbin now. 

“Hey you! Get back here!” The store clerk yelled.

“Oh shit.” Changbin swore, running out the store with a backpack full of food and medicine.

He laughed as the store clerk’s assistant made chase.

Changbin zipped in and out of alley ways and between buildings, coming to a small shed at the back of some shops. 

He hid. Chuckling when the store clerk’s assistant ran past the shed.

Someone cleared their throat from inside the shed.

“Holy shit. I’m so sorry I didn’t mean to-oh hey, is he okay?” 

Changbin took notice of the smallest boy, who was laying on one of their laps, asleep but coughing and breathing rather harshly. 

One of the other boys shook his head.  
“He has the flu.”

“What about getting him some medicine or going to see a doctor.” 

The other boy scoffed.  
“Does it look like we can afford any of that?” 

Changbin bit his lip.   
“I just swiped these...but you actually need them.” 

He took off his backpack, pulling out cough syrup, cold and flu tablets and a bottle of water. 

The boys looked to him in disbelief.

“Oh my god. Thank you...”

“Changbin.”

The boys smiled.  
“Thank you Changbin, I don’t know what I would do if I lost Jeongin. He’s my saviour.” 

Changbin smiled.  
“That’s okay. What are your names?”

Bangchan and Minho introduced themselves, telling the new boy about their lives on the streets.

Changbin pulled out food from his bag.  
“I have chips, granola bars and a few fresh bananas, apples and berries. Take your pick.” He smiled. 

The three boys first helped the youngest sit up, assisting in helping him take the cold and flu tablets, and helped him eat a banana that he thankfully managed to keep down. 

“Thank you again, Changbin for your help.” Minho smiled 

Changbin smiled back. 

Changbin didn’t ask to stay with them, he didn’t have to. 

They became a family of four rather quickly.


	6. Jisung

Jisung had something to prove. He had to prove his teachers wrong.

He was smarter than they gave him credit for and he was going to fucking prove it. 

“I’m sorry, you’re just not what we’re looking for.” The lady had said. 

Failed. Failure. 

Just like THEY said he was. 

He couldn’t breath, he ran out of the room, ignoring as the lady and gentleman tried to call him back. 

He didn’t stop tho. He couldn’t stop. 

They were right. Useless. Never amount to anything. Stupid. Stupid Jisung. 

He sobbed, running into the streets.

It was a whole six weeks later when he met Hyunjin. 

Hyunjin was sympathetic.  
“Sounds like you had a hard start to life.”

Jisung nodded  
“And what about you?” He asked.

“It was the school’s students. I always held my hand out, waiting for someone to take it. But no one ever did.” He frowned, thinking of his lonely life.

Hyunjin jumped in surprise when Jisung grabbed his hand.  
“I’ll hold your hand.”


	7. Hyunjin

Hyunjin never understood what he did wrong. 

Was it his looks?  
His style?   
Was it the way he did things?  
Because he was smart? 

Or was it because his parents were loaded? 

The dirty looks he received from his class mates at break time.

He lost count of how many lockers he was shoved inside of. 

And through all the hard times he had...his parents didn’t even notice. 

Only leaving sticky notes on the fridge and kitchen bench to prove they’ve been in the house. 

Hyunjin couldn’t take it anymore. 

He packed up his much needed shit, stole a bunch of cash his parents kept in a ‘secret’ place, and he walked out the doors for good.

A week later he was walking past a store when he noticed his photo on the TV.

He gaped.   
He read the closed captions.

“We don’t know when he ran away. But please, please, If you see our boy. Please contact us, let us know.” His mother on the TV sobbed. 

Hyunjin wonders if they only found out today that he had run away.   
“Hey, Isn’t that you on the tv.” The boy beside him asked. 

Hyunjin shook his head.  
“No, sorry. You’re mistaken.” He walked away quickly, the boy followed.

“I don’t think so. I get called dumb a lot, but I know that’s you. Hyunjin, am I right?” The boy held out his hand. 

Hyunjin sighed and nodded.  
“Yeah. I’m Hyunjin.” He sighed, expecting the boy to run off to claim the reward money. 

“I’m Jisung, and considering your face is all over the news, you might want to get off the streets if you don’t want to be found.” Jisung said with a smile.   
Hyunjin looked around, noticing everyone looking at him whispering.

“I know a place. Come with me.”


	8. Seungmin

Seungmin held his hands over his ears, crying. 

He couldn’t stand the fighting anymore. 

His aunt and uncle, his guardians, got like this when his uncle spent the evenings at the pub. 

“We’d be able to afford much luxurious things if we weren’t looking after your Sister’s bastard child!” He heard his uncle yell angrily. 

The words made Seungmin’s stomach drop with guilt. He knew he was a burden on this family. 

This was the last straw. 

He didn’t bother to grab anything except a jacket, he jumped out of his bedroom windows and not once looked back 

“Excuse me do you-“   
“Can I please-“  
“Do you have some-“ 

“Get out of my way, kid!” A grumpy old man snarled, pushing Seungmin to the ground.

“Oi, asshole! Haven’t you ever heard of manners!” A boy yelled to the old man, while a second boy helped Seungmin to his feet. 

“You alright?” Boy number one asked, dusting off Seungmin’s pants. 

Seungmin nodded shyly.  
“I’m sorry to bother you.” He bowed, trying to make a quick escape. 

“Hang on, wait!” One of the boys called out. 

Seungmin stopped, looking to the boys. 

“Do you have a place to stay?”  
Seungmin shook his head. 

“Then come with us, we’re staying not too far from here.” 

Seungmin hesitated. He knew better than to follow strangers.

But what choice did he have? To die of starvation on the streets? 

He followed the boys, Jisung and Hyunjin, he later found out. 

It was three day later when they ran into the other boys. Quite literally. 

None of them knew how, they just KNEW they were all a bunch of vagabonds living on the streets. 

“We stole some pizzas from a delivery guy if you’re interested.” Bangchan easily convinced them all to head to the one place together, an abandoned soft toy factory. 

None of them were ready for what fate had planned for them a few weeks later.


	9. Felix

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: this chapter contains suicide attempt.

Felix had enough of this life.

Being selectively mute made him a target for bullying and beatings. 

His Mum was never home, she liked to ignore Felix and his....weirdness. 

His Dad tried his best to help...but it just wasn’t enough. 

Nothing could fix Felix, he believed he was too far gone. 

That’s why he found himself here, the place he needed to be, hanging onto the railings, looking down over the edge of a high cliff. 

He knows he won’t survive, it’s a long drop after all. 

He sighed as he looked out over the city. It looked beautiful from this high up. He wonders if it’ll look just at beautiful as he-

“Hey Buddy, What are you doing?” Came a voice from behind him. 

He gasped in surprise. 

Turning his head, he noticed six pairs of worried eyes looking at him.

Felix looked to the one who spoke.  
“My name is Bangchan. What’s yours?” The boy smiled sweetly. 

Felix remained silent. 

Bangchan frowned.  
“Do you talk?” He asked. 

Felix shifted his eyes to look at the other boys again. 

“That’s okay if you don’t, there’s six of us who are willing to do all the talking for you.” 

One of the other boys cracked a smile.  
“I’m Minho.”

“Feli-“ Felix was quick to shut his mouth, stepping closer to the edge. 

He shouldn’t have said anything. 

“No, no, no, please.” Bangchan’s eyes filled with desperation. 

“Were you going to say ‘Felix’? Is that your name?” 

The younger boy nodded. 

“Please come back over this side, Felix. We’ll help you.” One of the other boys said. 

Felix turned his head to look out to the city.  
“You can’t help me.” His voice cracked as he began to cry. 

Minho stepped forward, holding his hand out to the young boy.  
“Please.”

Felix took a few long moments, just staring at the stretched out hand. 

He hesitantly took it. 

Minho, Bangchan and Changbin were quick to pull the boy back over the railing. 

Felix cried as he landed on top of Minho’s chest. 

“Don’t cry, I’ve got you.” Minho held the boy tightly, ignoring his own tears. 

The rest of the boys slowly stepped forward, not wanting to frighten the new boy. 

Jisung put a comforting hand on the boy’s back.  
“Do you want us to walk you home?” He asked.

Felix shook his head.  
“I’m not going back there. I can’t. They’ve probably read the note already.”

There was nothing else that needed to be said. 

The six boys dragged Felix back to their place. 

Minho looked around at the sleeping boys when they had all finally managed to doze off, all keeping the newest member close in a mountain of sleeping bodies.

Minho looked to Bangchan when the elder started to speak.

“I wonder why we chose today to go up on the mountain.” He thought loudly.

Minho sighed.  
“I keep asking myself the same thing. If we hadn’t gone today, he would be...he needs help, Chan.” He said teary.

“I know, Minho.” Bangchan mumbled.

“Are you going to make him go back home?” Came Jeongin’s small voice. 

Minho moved beside the youngest, running a hand through his hair.  
“Not unless he wants to. He is welcome to stay here with us if he wants to.” 

Felix never asked to stay, and no one asked if he wanted to. 

It just came as second nature to pick up stray kids off the street.


End file.
